I am a black woman who because of my fair complexion was many times mistaken for white, which led to identity problems when I was younger. My mother was the funeral director and co-owner of a highly respected mortuary in South Central Los Angeles. Her status brought celebrities into our lives, including Lou Rawls, and Redd Foxx and Johnny Cochran. In public Mother was a solid citizen; privately she was abusive, self-centered, and controlling. The embalming room was my refuge and the dead people were my friends. Often suicide seemed to be a reasonable alternative. When attempts were made to sexually assault me, Mother sided with the men and not with me. Her lifestyle forced me to endure life-threatening situations due too her drinking and wild ways. At age seventeen, I was encouraged to marry a man who I barely knew and was himself an alcoholic and very abusive. We had little to eat, slept in a car while I struggled to support the two of us with menial jobs. When our son was born my life changed. First the husband had to go. Next, I was determined to break the cycle of alcoholism, abuse and be a good mother and role model. After years of hard work and self-education, I achieved success, self-esteem and eventually a happy marriage. The book has sex, humor as well as tragedy, and it conveys the message that obstacles can be overcome, no matter the circumstances, life is worth living.
Mary Ross Smith
mary@asoulsurvivor.com
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